"JEANNETTE"

She used to live in Thousand Oaks, California.  Drove her new hunter green SUV all over.  Taking and bringing her four children to school was one of her fondest things to do during her days.  She lived in a beautiful home that she helped to buy with her hard earned money that she received working in the Air National Guard.  She wore her uniform proud especially when she went to Afghanistan or to other countries in the world.


She woke up each day bright and cheerful, as that was her personality.  Her kind and passionate ways were acknowledged by so very many people.  Even the dogs and cats at the local SPCA shelter wanted more than anything to live in her home.  She loved her animals especially cats. 


Her life was full and positive because of her.  She made up her mind to see good in everything.  A positive mind is what she was about.  Never one to think negative when a crisis would arise.  She was calm, cool and collected and everything that seemed to others a mess would somehow, become normal because of her. 


In 1999, I called her telling her of an issue I had at hand.  She calmly said to me, "Ma, don't worry, I will be down to Fresno tomorrow morning and help you."  She finished the phone call saying, "Ma, calm down, I love you o.k."   I hung up the phone so relieved and felt as if a big monkey had just fallen off my back.  She made that happen.  That is the kind of daughter I had. 


Everyday, every month, every year until 2008 there was no need to worry about Jeannette.  She was living a wonderful life.  My days at work were good and I always clocked out at 5:00 p.m. and headed straight home.  Turned on t.v. and would start making dinner.  My life was normal.  Except one day all my carefree days turned into a living nightmare.  It was Mother's Day 2008.  She came by herself to visit me.  I shall never ever forget the first night she stayed with me.  As I was about to call it a night she asked me to touch a lump she had on her upper right chest area.  Before I walked over to touch it she said the doctors at Kaiser said it was a pectoral muscle and that she was too young for a mammogram.  She was on muscle relaxers. 


I touched that lump.  The lump gave me goose bumps all over my body.  It was hard.  Something inside me wanted to cry and scream and call 911.  My emotions were held back because I didn't want her to be alarmed and panic.  I calmly told her to please get a second opinion ASAP.  She asked why.  I told her (calmly) "Mija, just do it, please."  She listened.  She slept.  I didn't. 


That was the start of the most tragic part of her life.  A total Horror Story. 


I miss her so much.  My life has never been the same.