HER LAST 4TH OF JULY

 It's 4th of July today.  A day of celebration, fireworks, barbeques, family gatherings, etc.  All this and more but without my Jeannette by my side.  I miss her so much and often go into my memory bank and think of all the previous 4th of July times with her before she died. 


1975:  In Disneyland.  She was only 4 years old.  We went on the "Cups" ride together and she cried on the first round but afterwards started to enjoy it.  We went into the shops and I bought her a hat and bracelet with Minnie Mouse on it.


As she grew older we would often go to the Fresno County Fairgrounds for big fireworks.  Then as an adult, she would spread her wings and go to the coast with her friends. 


2009:  I was with her on July 4, 2009 at Ventura Hospital.  She and I were talking when I received a phone call from my father telling me that my mother was having open heart surgery in Visalia and that she was asking for me.  I immediately left Jeannette's bedside and went to Visalia to be with my mother.  During my time with my mother, my ex husband (Jeannette's father) warped Jeannette's brain by telling her that I didn't care about her and that it was wrong of me to leave her bedside.  Jeannette called me and asked me if her grandma was really in the hospital because her dad said I made it all up.  What a garbage of a man to do that to his own daughter and fill her up with lies.  I was so angry.


In the end, my daughter passed away September 3, 2009 and my mother died three months later.  I shall never forget all the hurt that my ex brought on to me during my Jeannette's days on this earth. 


My last memory of her fourth of July is tainted with negativity brought on by her father.  I am sorry to say this because it's almost six years but I HATE HIM.