MY BEAUTIFUL JEANNETTE

2012 almost gone and 2013 on the way.  I will never forget Jeannette.  No not never.  2013 and many more if God permits.  I shall always and forever have her close to my heart. 

JEANNETTE SAYS DO NOT CRY FOR ME

Jeannette was a picture of beauty.  Everywhere she went she left some of her beauty behind.  I miss her so much and I sure wish I could be celebrating New Years Eve with her.   Diana says she dreamed of Jeannette and that in the dream Jeannette told her to tell me not to cry for her because she was so happy with God in Heaven.  As Diana was telling me about this we were both crying. 

When I think back to 2008/2009 I remember witnessing Jeannette in extreme pain and the profound sadness that I could not help her at all.  Nobody could take the pain away.   My Jeannette is free at last.  Free with God and no more pain. 

MY CHERISHED GIFT FROM ASHLEE

Ashlee calls me Grandmother Willow because just like in the movie, "Pocahantas", the tree had so much wisdom.  Anyway, during the opening of our gifts on Christmas morning I found this heart stopping letter inside a card that she gave me.  I became emotional and crying tears of joy.   This here letter means more to me than the Michael Kors purses, more than any gift that I recieved.  I stood up and hugged her so tight.  She is such a good young lady.  Has a heart of gold just like Jeannette did.  I am proud and blessed to have a beautiful granddaughter that not only goes to school, work but also goes to church.  She loves her family and at times mentions her grandpa whom she has not seen or heard from in years and who happens to live in same town and only few miles away.  What a shame on that man.   

Goodbye 2012, Hello 2013

Today is the last day of December, 2012.  Three years have come and gone since my beloved Jeannette passed away.  It seems like just yesterday that I was driving in the dark freeway from Ventura, California crying my eyes out.  I do not know how I made it home.  It was all a blur.  Jeannette was pronounced dead on September 3, 2009.  I was standing next to her hospital bed in complete shock that I lost my daughter.  I cried so many tears.   I thought about her children not having a mom anymore.  I hurt me so much.  Still does. 

Life goes on and if it wasn't for my family helping me through it all I just do not know what would have become of me. 

I look forward to 2013.  I look back on 2012.  A year of happiness since the birth of my baby girl grandchild named Melanie.  She looks like Jeannette. 

I will continue to love and cherish my family.  My son and daughter, my grandchildren, my dad, sisters, brothers, cousins, etc.  After all, that is what life is all about.  Family!!  Too bad my children's father chooses to be out of their lives and instead drinking and gambling his life away.  Hope 2013 brings him what he deserves. 

Jeannette will not never be forgotten!!!!

 

HAVE TO BE READY

As my birthday draws near I think about this poster I found on Internet.  It makes alot of sense..  I am privileged to have lived so long.  Longer than my dear Jeannette.  She was way too young to die.  I remember crying out to God telling him to please let me take her place.  I know now that God has a plan for all of us.  We have to be ready and ask forgiveness for all our sins so that we can go to Heaven. 

A MESSAGE TO JEANNETTE'S GRANDMOTHER

Mama, we three came together today to visit you at your resting place at the Corcoran Cemetery.   Ron and Brenda and me.  Three years have gone by since you died on Christmas Night.  It was a night I shall never forget.  I just couldn't handle loosing Jeannette and then you only three months later.  By the grace of God, I made it through.

 Mama, you left behind children that love you, grandchildren that adored you, great grandchildren that never got a chance to know you and above all else, you left Daddy, a most loving husband you had for over 63 years.  You were his right hand and you kept up on the house and bills, etc.  Your son, Sam, had to show dad how to pay bills and make out checks.  Your daughter, Brenda took over the household chores.  Believe me mama, she works so hard to clean and also take care of Dad.  She is one child you never thought would step up to the plate but she did and we all appreciate all that she does for Dad.  Mama, Ron is doing good and is having an awesome relationship with God.  He has been blessed in so many many things.

So many things have happened during these past three years since we lost you.   Your precious Spencer is daddy's best friend and keeps him good company.  It is so good to know dad is not alone. 

Mama, please tell Jeannette that she is so missed and that I know one day I will see you and her again. 

Love you so much.  I shall never forget your most famous words.  "Everyone look at Me."  You were so funny and at the same time so much wisdom.  I really miss our daily telephone calls. 

Love You

 

CHRISTMAS, THREE YEARS LATER

Christmas Morning here in Fresno, California.  Memories of long ago forever embedded in my mind.  I can still see Jeannette holding Loreal just like in this painting.  She loved her children with all her heart.  Each child had a special time with her.  Loreal, Mathew, Shane and Conner. 

She was amazing and beautiful and had the most loving heart.  The children are getting older now.  Loreal, Mathew, Shane and Conner.  I love all of them with all my heart.  I pray they will never forget their mom.   She is their Guardian Angel now. 

I am off to our family Reunion in Corcoran.  Today is the day my mother died  three years ago.  She left this world and joined Jeannette three months after Jeannette died.   I miss both of them.