my Jeannette. She was sitting there in the chemo therapy room waiting on the nurse. She had asked me to give her a mouth drop because her throat felt dry. I managed to find some inside my purse and much to my surprise she said it was her favorite. She sat there patiently and talking to me in a very calm voice. I was holding back tears as I watched my baby girl, my Jeannette suffer so much. She didn't belong in that place. How could this monster cancer invade her body. I just didn't understand. All I could do was carry my bible around and pray every time I had a chance. Begging God to heal her. I did not want to loose her. In the middle of all my thoughts she asked me something. She said to me, "Ma, let's go to "Tahoe Joe's" for dinner after this." I looked at her and smiled and I told her that I would go and do whatever she wanted. I think now that she wanted to distract me from my fear. I guess she could see it in my eyes.
I am looking at this picture and realized that the purse she has on the floor is the one that I have now. She gave it to me. I am changing purses after I post this and use that purse. Things like a purse of hers makes me feel better. Well, I am crying right now again. I see her face as though she is looking at me and telling me it's o.k., she is in Heaven now.
I miss her so much. She was my girl. My baby girl. My Nettle Poodle.
GLoria today is the day my grandma past away 3/17/12 its 12:32 am and i find myself crying because i miss her so much i feel so helpless without her but i pray to her to help make the pain i have go away, why is it so hard to except shes gone she was to young to die,i still needed her....
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