JEANNETTE KNEW WHO REALLY LOVED HER

Saturday morning in Fresno, California.  Hot already.  I have all my fans on in every room of my house.  I am on my way to pick up my grandson, Christian.  He is five years old and lives less than five minutes from my house.  I really enjoy his company.  He makes me laugh so much.  I realized long ago that he is one of my tools I use to cope with the profound grief over the loss of my Jeannette.  Everyday is a struggle for me.

 Other people go on about their lives never looking back and just focusing on their own personal pleasures in life.  I am referring to Jeannette's father.  He has a black heart.  Never, not never calls his own children or grandchildren.  At least to ask how are they doing.  No, no, his main priority is money.  He is going to wake up one day and it might be his last day here on earth.  All alone and surrounded by his money.  What a miserable death it will be. 

 My Jeannette told me towards the end of her life that she knew who really loved her.  It was all the Balderama family.  My beloved mother would call Jeannette on the phone and would tell her how much she loved her.  My dad would pray for Jeannette over the telephone.  My sisters would sing hymns to her over the phone as Jeannette lay in pain in the hospital in Ventura, California.  My whole family loved Jeannette and she knew it.

 On the contrary, her dad and his wife were just there to see what they could scam out of the whole ordeal.  I am still angry after all these years.  No amount of therapy will take away all the anger I have towards Jeannette's husband, father and step mother.  I do know God will deal with them.  I have nothing to do with them.  I do not envy their lavish lifestyles.  I am here for my children and grandchildren.  I am here for my 84 year old father, I am here for my brothers and sisters and numerous relatives.

 I am here for my Jeannette.  My beautiful awesome God fearing daughter who is in Heaven now and free from pain. 

I miss my Nettle Poodle