SHE LOOKED AT ME WITH THOSE EYES, THOSE BEAUTIFUL EYES

Jeannette was getting her last Chemotherapy.  Her doctor told her that there was nothing more she could do for her except give her pain medication.  I was there in the room and heard her doctor tell her the sad news.  She managed to stay calm but I could tell she wanted to scream and cry just like I did.  We were escorted into the therapy room.  There were about 8 older people already receiving their IV chemo medicine.  Jeannette sat down on the chair.  She looked at me with those eyes.  Those beautiful eyes of hers.  I could tell she wanted to say something but the words were hard to say.  I tried to make her feel comfortable and asked her if she needed anything.  She asked for a blanket.  I noticed that her both breast were engorged.  I could see how the cancer was taking over her body.  She was on heavy pain medicines that did not take her pain away completely.  My dear daughter went through so much.  She was poisoned and burned by chemo and radiation.  For what?  I kept telling her why mija, why keep hurting and burning yourself.  She always said this to me. "Ma, I do it for my children cause I do not want to leave them without a mom."  Jeannette did not have complete support from her husband.  Her dad and his wife were there with her for gain.  I found out they were manipulating her regarding her will.  This still makes me angry.  Someday, all three of them will have to answer to God.  I will never forget the time in the hospital when Jeannette was crying out in pain and I was like a mad woman screaming at the nurses to give her more pain meds.  My ex, her dad came up to me and asked me this.  "Will your God save our daughter."  When he said, "Your God.", it just told me that he doesn't believe in God.  Maybe that is why he has no conscious and is an evil human being. 
My Jeannette, how I wish right now I could get off this PC and go back out to my living room and she would be there telling me, "Ma, hurry, you're missing best part of this movie."  Reality sits in.  I am alone here.  Alone with precious memories of a beautiful, wonderful daughter.  My Jeannette.